May 19, 2009
Panel 1:"Yep. Lucky, lucky, lucky. If those criminals had been any less incompetent, Andy and I would be lying dead on some abandoned logging road and Rusty would be giving $3 blowjobs in Tijuana."
Panel 2: Where's our resident naturalist, Ace? WTF kind of bird is that? Sparrow/whippoorwill hybrid? Something else altogether?
Panel 3:"I've been having difficulty urinating and I've been experiencing some general discomfort in my, shall we say, poopchute. I'd like for you to poke around a little back there and see if you can find anything unusual."
BREAKING NEWS!: Our Resident Naturalist, Ace Buttockio, has confirmed that the Jackelrod Sphere has given us an accurate and recognizable picture of a species of bird that actually exists in nature and could, conceivably, be a member of the natural fauna of Lost Forest. Ladies and Gentlemen, I present the Red-Breasted Nuthatch, a bird who's very name makes Mark Trail quiver with revulsion.