January 1, 2009
Panel 1: Okay, that’s one reason. Any others?
Panel 2: How about some teeth for our lady friend, eh Jackelrod Sphere?
Panel 3: That’s right Sue. I mean, here you’ve gone and saved a good 15-20 acres of wetland. Certainly that will mitigate the wholesale destruction of greenfields and wetlands that occurred before you fell under the spell of our androgynous naturalist. And, of course, the only logical conclusion that we can draw from your decision is that you will never develop another wetland again. Right, Sue?
January 2, 2009
Panel 1: Look at that. Howdy-Doody is so easy to use that even a little girl can make him utter saccharine bullshit on cue.
Panel 2: Subtext: “And though I live close enough to drive here, I will never, ever return to this festering swamp filled with in-bred rustics and giant Howdy-Doody mannequins.
Panel 3: Subtext: “But don’t drive away just yet, Sue, I’m busy rubbing my bald, plastic crotch against your windshield column.”